How to have it all

Do you ever feel less than successful in an endeavor or goal? Have you ever secretly been jealous of those who seem to attract success? Does it ever feel like you are always just missing out on the next goal or achievements?

What if I told you it has nothing to do with luck? What if I told you that you can most definitely create the most successful life of your dreams? Would you believe that is true? I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Whether you believe you can or whether you believe you cannot; you are correct.” I’ve been reading the book “The 10X Rule” by Grant Cardone and these are some of his steps and tips to becoming more successful and living life in the “10X” manner.

It’s all up to you; and you decide if you will be a success story for others to aspire to, or not. Simply put, here are some of Grant’s steps to help you begin your successful life. You must embrace these attitudes and beliefs as your own. You must live and breathe these basic, proven principles in order to create the success you are looking for. Anything less than these qualities will just equal less than successful results.

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#1. Successful people have a can do attitude. This means that no matter what comes, there is a way. We must always maintain that a solution exists in any situation. There are no excuses. Respond to the most daunting situations in the most positive way. You must believe that a solution does indeed exist even if you have to work extra hard in finding one. End of story.

#2. Successful people say, “I can figure it out”, when faced with a challenge or question. Even if you’re not sure how to do something, the best answer is always, “I’ll figure it out”, not “I don’t know”. This response does nothing for your confidence or your competence. When we say, “I don’t know”, it only shows that we are unwilling to find an answer. When I have clients ask me a question that I really don’t know; I don’t tell them that. I am honest with them but say, “That’s a great question. Let me check into that and figure out what the answer is.” Just being honest is key but also giving the response that we are going to find the answer instead of just shrugging our shoulders and accepting defeat. That’s what unsuccessful people do.

#3. Successful people focus on opportunity. They see situations and even problems, as opportunities. Problems that are solved equal new success. You can never truly succeed without some degree of difficulty. For example, if you want to become fitter and stronger, you have to put your  body through an exercise program that challenges you and creates discomfort and challenge. Only then, can you see the success and enjoy the results. It doesn’t matter what the challenge is, if you handle it adequately, you will be rewarded. Those who see problems as an opportunity and push for the solution; will see the successful outcome. Most people see setbacks as an excuse to stop moving forward or succeeding. Have you ever complained about the economy, recessions, conflicts, complaints from others, your own complaints and worries and how these areas were the “cause” of your problems? They are only telling you that you need to find a solution in order to succeed.

#4. Successful people love challenges.  Unsuccessful people see challenges as negative experiences but successful people are compelled and invigorated by challenges. I remember being scared when faced with a challenge in life. I would cower and hide and wish and hope that it would disappear so I could feel comfortable again. But staying “comfortable” never allowed me to grow into the successful person I was working towards. I had to adopt the mindset to embrace every challenge as a new journey to another level. Kind of like when I played “Mario Bros” with my kids. Every time I “leveled up” was only after I had faced a challenge and persevered. If I failed, I would just repeat it over and over again, until I succeeded. That’s the intensity that a successful person must have in order to succeed further along the way.

#5. Successful people love to solve problems. Think about everything in life that we deal with. Problems arise at every turn and every situation, right? I know when my kids were young and when they would get sick, it was my top priority to solve their issues. “Does your tummy hurt?” “Do you feel hot?” “Tell me what’s hurting you.” And with these answers, it was my goal to help to resolve the issues so that we could get them to start feeling better as soon as possible. Even if the situation was out of my control; like when my daughter started wheezing and could hardly breathe due to eating a candy containing peanuts (and she’s seriously allergic to peanuts). I scooped up my 5 year old “baby” and rushed her to the ER to get immediate, medical attention. I didn’t just say, “Oh, that’s too hard. I don’t have the skills to fix this”; and just shrug my shoulders! That would have been insane and very incompetent as a parent. I found a solution. I was working for the solution no matter what. That’s the mindset of a successful person in any situation.

#6. Successful people persist until successful. The ability to keep going no matter what happens; setbacks, bad news, resistance, etc…is a trait of a successful person. No matter what happens, if we keep moving forward; we will always reach the goal over time. Think about how children persist when they want something. Have you ever had a child ask for something that they wanted? They don’t stop. I remember grocery shopping with my kids when they were young, and every time they’d see something they wanted me to buy; they would ask incessantly until either, I’d put it in the cart or move on to another item they wanted instead. Talk about persistence!! It’s about staying on track with the goal in mind; not the issues that arise. There will always be issues that arise.

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#7. Successful people take risks. I’ve been working my online coaching business now for over 6 years. I had to come to the realization that I was not going to advance beyond my current potential if I was going to keep playing in the safe zone. I have succeeded enough in this business to validate that I can earn more than in my previous “day” job but honestly, there is more to be done and in order to achieve more…I had to decide to step out of my comfort zone and take some risks. Put myself out there online and share my story of failures, successes, challenges, etc? That sounded really scary and what would other people think? Would they judge me for doing this or for the things I would be baring? Yes and no. There will always be those who think negatively of anything we are doing. There will also be those who want to follow you and join you as you show who you really are and as they can relate with your story. The main focus should be on the outcome and being completely honest about myself and my life. I am not perfect and I don’t pretend to be perfect but some things are really scary to share. But this is what risk means to me. This is where I need to push myself in order to achieve more growth. Since I’ve done this, I’ve seen a humongous shift in my success and I continue to push myself outside the comfort zone. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

#8. Successful people must be unreasonable. Sound crazy? Being unreasonable simply means being irrational and not in accordance with realities. I know it sounds like I’m off my rocker but honestly, in order to be successful, we have to act without common “reasoning”. We have to step out of the box of “normalcy” and “average” thinking and average actions. If we stay in the realms of “reason”; the impossible will never become “possible”. I’ve been called “crazy”; among other definitions. People see my daily habits and regime completely ridiculous and “unreasonable”. They say, “You wake up at 5am to get your day started?” “There is NO WAY I could do that! I’m a night owl!” “That’s just crazy and unreasonable!” But then they also turn around and tell me that they envy my results, how I seem to be more productive than they are, how I must be “lucky” in some way. Really? Or is it just because of the fact that I choose to live “unreasonably” to what others are interested in doing?

#9. Be dangerous. I know this is the opposite of what we’ve been taught to do since childhood. Being cautious never allows us to reach new heights and enjoy new successes. In order to do something big, we have to be willing to embrace danger. Like I said above, it’s scary for me to put myself out there and share my life and my story of ups and downs. But I cannot attain my goals of reaching the millionaire’s club with this business if I’m always playing it safe. What do you truly want to achieve? Can it be attained by taking slow and careful steps or do you need to take massive action in order to achieve those bigger goals? Just like a trained fighter who steps into the boxing ring; the way to succeed in our goals and not be “killed” by the dangerous steps is to be properly “trained” and come out the victor in the end.

#10. Create wealth. People who have a “poor person’s” mentality believe they have to work for their money and then when they earn that money…they spend it on something unimportant OR they work hard to conserve and protect that earned money. The successful mindset is in knowing and understanding that money has already been made. We must instead, generate wealth through the exchange of new ideas, products and services and solutions. Not “making” money. Wealth is not limited to a monetary supply. Income is taxed; wealth is not. Changing my mindset to the “earn, conserve and save”  to the “let’s generate more wealth in the areas that money is flowing” was not an easy change. Our behaviors and our mindsets have been formed from our past and what we’ve been taught. It was only through trainings and personal development that I learned a new way of thinking; or the way that successful people think and believe. How many people do you know who create wealth versus those who just “earn a living”?

#11. Readily take action. Highly successful people take unbelievable steps of action. They rarely do nothing. Even when on vacation. I know I’ve always looked up to the way my father thinks, acts and works. He never stops or slows down in his goals; whatever they may be. He has been successful all of his life. Looking from the outside, you would think he had everything just come to him like a magnetic shift. But if you were to look more closely, you would know how many challenges and struggles have been in his way and how he never stopped finding a solution; how we never stopped taking action. I like to think that I have that personality. I work on improving it and building that “muscle” to be able to keep taking action on my goals and push through any challenges and any obstacles. Think about someone whom you admire because of their successes. Have you ever thought that they were simply “lucky” and had everything drawn to them? That is never the case. Success never happens to us; success happens because of us. In order to create success, we must take massive action and never stop until we succeed…and then keep going.

#12. Always say YES!!!! Eagerly engage in life and the possibilities of life in order to become more successful. Life is to be lived. Finding a way to make things work and creating new ways to succeed, should be the driving force when anything is asked of a successful person. The goal is to find a way, or a “YES” at every request. Think about a time when you called a customer service number with a problem; wouldn’t you feel more positive with the company if the representative immediately said, “Yes, I will find a way to resolve this issue”, rather than, “I’m sorry but we can’t help you”? I know I would and that’s the type of attitude a successful person takes when approached with a question or dilemma.

#13. Put it all on the line or be all in. Unsuccessful people rarely do much of anything at all. They talk a lot about “trying” to do something versus actually “doing” it. Most people rarely see anything through or work until they succeed in their goals. When was the last time you decided to “put all of your chips into the pot”? I know that I became extremely disappointed in myself with my business a year ago when I realized I had not grown in any way for over a year. The initial thought that I had was, “This isn’t working! I can’t grow this anymore than I have! I QUIT!” But the new mindset in me shot back with, “But what have you done differently in the past few years in order to achieve more?” And I knew I hadn’t done all that I should. It was at that moment in time, when I was ready to call it in and QUIT, that I said, “That’s it! I’m all in!” I vowed to do what I needed to do and be scared and follow what successful people were doing in the industry and stop complaining about my lack due to my inconsistencies. That is what it truly takes to be successful. It won’t happen by accident and it won’t magically appear any easier than this. Just DO IT! Just JUMP INTO THE DEEP END OF THE POOL! I would rather work with someone who is fully ready to commit rather than someone who is fully educated on how to do it. I know the team members I work with who are fully invested and doing what they say are the ones who succeed. Those who tell me they want it but show little or no action will never amount to much more than a hobby. I know, I did that too. I love the saying, “Stop talking and show me your feet”…or “get moving and stop talking about it!”

#14. Go all the way. Taking any endeavor and only going halfway is a waste of time. If you are going to set a goal of losing 100 lbs by summer and you get lazy, tired and off track and only lose 20 lbs instead…what does that feel like? I know it doesn’t feel great. Yes, maybe you feel happy that you are 20 lbs lighter than before; but what is the underlying thought in the back of your mind? “I didn’t reach my goal. I’m a failure. I didn’t do what I wanted. I need to lose more weight next time.” Right? If we half ass anything, we know we half assed it. We may tell ourselves we are happy with what we’ve achieved but if there is a bigger need for that bigger goal then we are going to feel like we fell short. And we did. It doesn’t mean we can’t keep going but it does mean that if we give up, we may have been better off not wasting the time to work to lose just the 20 lbs that will probably be gained again by going to our previous habits. So if you have a goal, only go after it if you are all in. If you won’t stop when you are tired, bored, busy, etc…but you stop when you are freaking there! And then you find a way to maintain that and not go back to where you started. Doesn’t that already sound like a better success rate? Less dieting tips would fill our lives and more success stories this way!

#15. Do it now. Stop looking backwards and stop waiting for a future date or magical “time”. Putting off any task is only an excuse and will never help you reach your goals. Successful people jump in today and never procrastinate. Action is necessary for all success. Putting it off only puts of your goals indefinitely and this becomes a habit over time. I know you probably can think of at least one person in your life who does procrastinates regularly. It drives me nuts…and especially when I’ve done it!! Now is the time.

The more you can do things that scare you and push you forward; the stronger you become and the more courageous you look to others. It’s just like working on your muscles of your body to look better physically; you have to take action or nothing will change. Take action in your life in whatever you are looking to achieve and don’t let the unsuccessful thoughts or behaviors to cloud your focus.

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